I’m not obsessed with ghosts or anything, they just seem to be occupying a lot of my time lately. So, light a fire, throw an afghan over your legs and cozy up for another horrifying ghost story.
Once upon a time, two families of friends went on a vacation together to South Dakota. This intrepid crew stopped at a ghost town that had been used in movies to sight-see and have lunch in an old train car. There were cats in the area and while my memory is a little iffy for the details, I’ll recount the tale as best I can. There was a noise, or a meow or something and not a single one of those varmints was visible. The Dad of one of the families said somthing like, “You have to jump up and down and spin around three times so the ghost cat can’t follow you home.” The Mom of the other family laughed and said, “I’ll take my chances.” THAT brave reader was a mistake.
Fast forward a few years to June 27, 2011. That foolish Mom was making dinner for her family. It was a lovely dinner of roast beef, mashed potatoes, green beans and crescent rolls. This Mom uses real butter in her cooking, so she opened the last new box of butter that she had, took one stick out to use in the potatoes and on the rolls and made a mental note that the three sticks that were left were more than enough to make the frosting for her son’s birthday cake the next day and for any general uses the family would have until she could get to the grocery store.
The next day, the family went fishing. It was a last minute decision, and an important cake needed to be made, but the Mom decided to go ahead and go with her family and make the cake when she got home. The family had a wonderful time and the little boy caught 13 tiny blue gills. When they got home, the Mom got in the refrigerator to get out a stick of butter to soften for the frosting while she made the cake. She looked high and low, in the fridge drawers and in the dairy thingy on the door. She couldn’t find the butter! She called her husband and said, “While I put the cake together, could you please look for the butter? There are three sticks in the box. I’ve looked and I can’t find it and I really need to get this cake made.” So he looked. He looked high and low, in the drawers and in the dairy thingy on the door. He couldn’t find it either!! He asked the Mom if she was sure about the butter. She said absolutely, and went through the entire story again. “Well, if you remember it that well, you can’t be mistaken.”
This always thinking Dad started looking in the garbage can. The empty butter box was in the garbage! It was laying on TOP of some papers that the Mom had thrown away that morning before the fishing trip! He looked for the papers that would’ve been wrapped around the butter sticks. They were not there. He questioned the children. They knew nothing. The Mom and Dad snuck around the house looking for abandoned butter stick papers in the kid’s rooms, behind couches, in office trash cans. NOTHING!! The Mom in her very smart way pointed out that whoever had taken the butter and thrown away the box had done so AFTER the family went fishing. The mystery gets even deeper here. No one else has keys to the family’s house, so the only logical explanation is that a GHOST had taken the butter and eaten it or used it to get back through the portal to the other realm because the butter was completely and totally absent and gone from the house.
SO, the Ghost Cat who obviously followed this poor family home, brought a friend and waited stealthily like cats are know to do, until the family sort of forgot about him and when they least expected it, he whipped out his friend, THE BUTTER GHOST to terrorize these innocent people.
Moral of the story? Next time someone tells you that you have to do a fancy and public dance to ward off a ghost, you’d better do it, because they bring friends. MWUHAHAHAHHhaaaaa……
I realize how terrorizing this tale is, and I would like to tell you that it is not true, unfortunately, it is 100% true. Ghost Cat dance and disappearing butter and all. I’m sorry if you now have to sleep with your lights on…